Hot Swap

Nicole and Meghan dive headfirst into uncharted territory with their first-ever romance novel exchange. And things get spicy faster than either of them anticipated. After exchanging books based on loose personal connections (Nicole's husband is named Bob), the hosts discover they've accidentally thrust each other into the deep end of the romance pool.

Nicole tackles "B.O.B.'s Fall," a futuristic erotica where B.O.B. stands for "battery-operated boyfriend" -- a sex droid containing the consciousness of a Scottish CEO following an assassination attempt. With what she describes as "90% gratuitous sex and 10% plot," Nicole navigates through multiple-chapter sex scenes while trying to find enough story to keep her engaged. Despite the gratuitous nature, she thankful this was a quick read but questions some concerning consent issues throughout the narrative.

Meanwhile, Meghan approaches "Mine" with trepidation after reading its synopsis suggesting heavy domination themes. To her surprise, she discovers a balanced CIA protection romance with a "50-50 split" between meaningful plot and steamy scenes. The book explores the relationship between two strong-willed characters dealing with past traumas, featuring refreshingly realistic relationship dynamics that acknowledge conflicts without painting them as deal-breakers.

Both hosts rate their selections as "Habanero" on their spicy Scoville scale -- decidedly hot but not reaching their highest heat rating. Their discussion expands beyond the books themselves to examine the curious disconnect between romance marketing and content, questioning why synopses and covers so often misrepresent what readers will find inside.

What makes this episode particularly delightful is the hosts' willingness to step outside their comfort zones while maintaining their trademark humor and honest commentary. Whether you're a seasoned romance reader or curious about the genre's spicier side, you'll appreciate their candid reactions and thoughtful analysis of what makes relationships work both on and off the page.

Join us for this unexpectedly educational journey through sci-fi erotica and CIA protection romance -- and stay tuned for next episode's more conventional book exchange featuring characters in the beauty industry and resale business.

Cocktails/Beverages for the Episode:

Meghan -- Coffee

Nicole -- Glengoyne Scotch (12 year)

Buy the Books (via our Amazon affiliate links):

B.O.B.'s Fall by Lora Leigh and Veronica Chadwick

Mine by HelenKay Dimon

Transcript

Nicole:

I’m Nicole Danielle.

Meghan:

And I'm Meghan Leigh.  And this is Romance on the Rocks, where two bookish biddies imbibe. And this week talk about some real spicy stuff. 

Nicole:

Yeah, if you're new to the podcast, every episode we read romance novels and we rate them on our spicy Scoville scale.  And we issue little prizes, like boobie prize, for the first mention of boobs or breasts in a book.  And we have romantic reminders. So, that's what we've got in store for you today, and I'm just going to say there's going to be a lot of warnings today for the sexually explicit content. 

Meghan:

Oh, buddy.  

Nicole:

Just to also fill in our listeners, for those of you who haven't been here before and those of you who may have tuned in last time but have forgotten, we are doing a book exchange. So this…

Meghan:

Between the two of us? 

Nicole:

Yeah, yeah, between the two of us. We have exchanged a couple romance novels. We chose them for each other for varying reasons. 

Meghan:

I do feel like we're going to have to maybe sit back and explain why we chose these books for each other. I'm going to say the book I chose for you. I've already given apologies in advance. I truly had no idea. I am I am very apparently out of touch with an awful lot and had no clue what I was getting you into. 

Nicole:

You knew what hot-wifing was when I asked you. 

Meghan:

You know you know the trends. 

Nicole:

You're hip with the lingo?  I know the trends. I feel like I just maybe there's one or two things I'm hip to and I've heard it and I'm like, yeah, I get you. 

Meghan:

I had no idea what yours was, so do you just want to take it away? You are going first.

Nicole:

Oh, but we do have to talk about our beverages, I suppose. 

Meghan:

Yeah, yeah, I was going to say this, get into it so people know what I am I'm blabbering about. But okay, beverages, beverages. And again, I'm still doing my health and wellness challenge. We probably have one more podcast to get through before I can finally start doing proper imbibing with all y'all. I'm just coffee again. Tonight there wasn't much for drinking in my book. There was, you know, a few…few pots of coffee. So, I'm going boring, going old school. God, you guys. I hope I can get you something fantastic once I'm out of here, because I feel like I'm a broken record. Can you save us, Nicole? Do you have some delightful beverage? 

Nicole:

I have a cocktail. Yes, I have some scotch on the rocks. It's a Glengoyne 10-year. It's Bob's. I stole it, but I was struggling to come up with a cocktail and we're trying to stay on theme. This book that you gave me to read is called Bob's Fall, and the guy is Scottish and my husband is a Bob and he loves scotch, so I'm just drinking some scotch and we're calling it good, Very good. 

Meghan:

Very good. I had an episode pretty early on that I did scotch on the rocks as well. That was back when I read Nora Roberts. I think we were doing our political ones. Yes, yes, I can't think of what that one was called, but it was of the McGregor clan series, and I did Scotch on the Rocks back then. Yeah, and I would love to do that again with you today. 

Nicole:

I poured two shots for both of us, don't worry.

Meghan:

Thank you.

Nicole:

I got you. 

Meghan:

All right. So, take it away, Nicole, you get to go first. 

Nicole:

Oh, Meghan, okay, book swap, right. The first books we're doing for the first part of the month are tongue-in-cheek, “ha-ha”, you know spicy type things. 

Meghan got me something called “Bob's Fall”, thinking, oh, your husband is Bob. Well, it's B.O.B., as in battery-operated boyfriend. So, I started flipping through it after she sent it to me and I got it in the mail and I was like, uh oh. So, I sent Meghan something equally spicy. But don't worry, folks, on the next episode it's going to be probably pretty standard operating procedure, because she got me a delightful book that I'll tease later on in this episode with a hairstylist and I got her one with a reseller because, Meghan does resale. So, don't worry, we'll get back to normal. But I am going to warn everybody, this is going to be explicit in this episode. 

Meghan:

I'm just going to interrupt, though, and say not, “get back to normal”, because the whole point is for us to read a wide swath. 

Nicole:

And you know what? Now I can say I've covered erotica. 

Meghan:

Well, you've covered something. I'm looking forward to hearing what. So, bring it on. 

Nicole:

All right. “Bob's Fall”. This one is by Laura Leigh and Veronica Chadwick- a two-fer, if you will. Published in 2005, I'm putting this under the genre of erotica, with a side note of sci-fi and futuristic.

Spoilers, and trigger warnings. Let me read from the book itself for this: “The following material contains graphic sexual content meant for mature readers. Bob's Fall has been rated erotic by a minimum of three independent reviewers. Has been rated erotic by a minimum of three independent reviewers. Elora's Cave Publishing offers three levels of Romantica Reading Entertainment: S for sensuous, E for erotic and X for extreme.

Meghan:

You didn't even get that far.

Nicole:

No.

Meghan:

Well, now there's something on my bucket list to find for you. 

Nicole:

Well, check out Elora's Cave Publishing for Extreme. So sensuous: sensuous love scenes are explicit and leave nothing to the imagination. Erotic love scenes are explicit, leave nothing to the imagination and are high in volume per the overall word count. In addition, some E-rated titles might contain fantasy material that some readers find objectionable, such as bondage, submission, same-sex encounters, forced seductions, etc. E-rated titles are the most graphic titles we carry. It is common, for instance, for an author to use such words as fucking, cock, pussy, etc. Within their work of literature. Extreme titles differ from E-rated titles only in plot, premise and storyline execution. Unlike E-rated titles, stories designated with the letter X tend to contain controversial subject matter, not for the faint of heart. 

Meghan:

I'm so glad I was able to provide you with lengthy, explicit, graphic wordiness. 

Nicole:

Okay, I am going to spoil this book because fuck it. 

I mean, someone fucked it there was a lot of fucking in this book. My hot take this is giving me penthouse letters, slash Highlander to the quickening slash AI. The movie vibes. So that's my hot take. All right for main characters. 

We have Eliana Richards, an Aussie romance writer. Then we have Mac the McDougal, a Scottish CEO of some large freaking company or corporation that owns the publishing company that puts out Eliana's novels. He thinks romance novels are frivolous and ridiculous and believes Miss Richards is naive and doesn't have a clue about sex or the real world, but he thinks he could teach her. Then there's his sister, Amorath, and she is head of his security. The year is 2375. Let's just dive right into this very thin and weak plot. We enter the story with Mac's life on the line as the result of an assassination attempt. His sister is going to try to transfer his consciousness and memories to a sex droid that the company has been working on, and the version of the droid that they're going to use for this is actually modeled after a younger version of Mac himself, which he didn't know about, but his sister did and I'm like…so your sister was in charge of picking the models and she picked her brother? I have questions. And they never get answered. Odd choice is all I'm saying. The goal is that they can save his consciousness and memories and ensure those are secure and then try to repair his body. But if they can't do that, at least the rest is saved and can be stored in the droid. So, they do the transfer and are in the defragging process as one does with a computer. 

When Mac, the sex droid, wakes up and flees, he's confused and doesn't quite know what happened or who he is. But he feels strongly compelled to do one thing: Find Eliana Richards and fuck her. And he does a lot, a lot like, a lot. Oh boy, hold on, I gotta. I gotta get a grip on myself because I can't even get through this. 

Okay, breathing Amorath, his sister, is left to try to solve the mystery of who tried to kill her brother and she has to figure out where the heck this sex droid with her brother's mind went and determine if she can get his consciousness back into his now healed real body. Eventually she does and there is an additional assassination attempt as they try to make the transference. It all turns out well and Mac is put back in his proper body and immediately marries Eliana and whisks her away to his Scottish castle. And then we have a super weird epilogue and I'm still trying to sort this one out. They're talking about how they're married but they're not really getting along, but they're banging all the time. And then Amarath is at the castle too, I think. And then she has her own battery-operated boyfriend, sex droid, who I'm pretty sure this is what I read, I think it's modeled after her cousin Tail, who she's secretly in love with. And yeah.

Meghan:

Oh, that girl's got a lot of issues. 

Nicole:

Yeah, there's a lot of trauma in this family, not that I'm condoning this or any of this behavior, but yeah, so it's really kind of sad actually, because she's just at the very end, the sister is with her battery operated boyfriend and she's like, oh, at least I have this, because I don't really have the real thing, and I'm like that is so sad, and then it just ends and it leaves you hanging. 

Meghan:

Okay, well, beyond that being sad, first, I love the name Amarath, that's great. Second, are we ever given a reason why he's the subject of assassination attempts, like, is there a purpose behind this, or is it just that thin of a plot that it's just like if somebody tried kill him? Oh no, they're trying to kill him again. 

Nicole:

Yeah, since I'm going ahead and spoiling this shit. Uh, it's another cousin that is pissed off and jealous or something and yeah, right, so the family's got a lot of problems. Oh yeah, Amarath and Mac's parents were like murdered when they were little. And, yeah, spice level, unbelievably. Meghan, I'm only giving this one a habanero. It's almost a Carolina Reaper but it's still a habanero. 

There's sex and lots of it, and in multiple configurations. There's masturbation, there's mutual masturbation, there's oral sex, there's anal sex, but it was all pretty standard stuff and nothing that left me dead on a Carolina Reaper level. Things that I loved. It was a quick read and I guess I appreciated the liberal attitude towards masturbation and sex in terms of Eliana being free to pursue either without societal judgment. I was like okay, challenges, you know I like my book spicier, Meghan, but this was kind of right over the line of too much for me. This book was 90% gratuitous sex and 10% plot. I believe I sent you a chart and a graph showing that I personally need just a bit more plot and not for my sex scenes to last entire chapters, plural. 

Meghan:

Like one sex scene is multiple chapters?

Nicole:

Yes, ma'am, yes, ma'am, and then the actual story is like two pages in between. 

Meghan:

Oh that, that’s impressive.  Okay, you know you can be impressed with things you don't particularly like. 

Nicole:

Yeah, sure, sure uh, yeah. So, I need just a bit more plot and believability in general to enjoy a spicy read. Other challenges Eliana immediately starts banging Mac when he shows up at her house, even though neither of them know who he is really. Maybe that's how they roll in the future I will give them the benefit of the doubt, but I still find it questionable. He shows up and they're banging within minutes. Then Mac forces her to do anal play and have anal sex. She tells him exit only, but he's like nah, we're doing this. And literally tells her her asshole belongs to him. Can't make this shit up. I did not care for that. I also didn't like that. Mac is a non-communicative asshole who is super possessive and easily gets jealous. Those are my challenges with the book. 

Meghan:

Yeah, I wonder why she was unhappy in the end, right? 

Nicole:

Final thoughts before I have some gems for you. While I am tempted to possibly read more from the erotica genre, I don't think sci-fi, futuristic in that realm is my jam, which is interesting because I do like sci-fi movies and futuristic movies and shows, but I guess I'm just not feeling it in terms of a romance read, for whatever reason. I also have a new quotable that may just be right up there with JT Montgomery's “Breathe for Me, baby. Breathe For Daddy Montgomery.”

Meghan:

What do you got? 

Nicole:

This one is from Mac the McDougal and it's “Bloom For Me, baby.” 

Meghan:

Oh, I almost wish that my drink tonight had been the brand new kombucha I have in the fridge. I've got one that's called Bloom Nice. That would have been appropriate, would have been so great. 

Nicole:

So now I'm going to just start telling everybody Bloom for me. 

Meghan:

You're going to tell everybody that? I mean, that's how you're rolling in your future. I see. 

Nicole:

Okay, and then we have a couple of quick, funny anatomy references” “Snug Portal”.

Meghan:

Oh!

Nicole:

And “Snug Clasp” in reference to her vajayjay. 

Meghan:

Huh.  A clasp.  Yeah, that's new. 

Nicole:

“And the clasp gloved him.”

Meghan:

Oh, see, the gloving I've definitely heard before.  But the clasp is new to me. 

Nicole:

I don't know that I love it, but I don't hate it.  It's alright.

Meghan:

It's a little purse.

Nicole:

Like yeah, meh.  A little grabby, yeah. 

Also, this is no longer Fun Anatomy references - this is just something that came up in conversation between my actual husband, Bob. He talked about her convulsing pussy and I was like, “Robert, have you ever noticed a pussy convulsing?” And he's like, “Maybe when a girl comes.” But I was like, ok, yeah, I feel like it's one of those words, that I understand what they were getting at, but I also feel like that's not the word I would use in that context. Like I feel like convulsing. 

Meghan:

I think of medical in terms of like having a seizure or something.

Nicole:

So like I don't think about it in a sexual…not that it's a wrong usage, it just seems awkward. 

Yeah, so there you have it in a nutshell. 

Meghan:

That's it, huh? 

Nicole:

Yep, that's all she wrote, or they wrote. 

Meghan:

Indeed, all right. Well, on to my novel. 

Nicole:

Oh, I can't wait to hear. 

Meghan:

Well, I will tell you in advance, liked it way more than I thought I was going to.  For anybody who was here when I read the synopsis and could not stop laughing at it, I really thought this was going to be really hard to get through.  But it was pretty good. I enjoyed it. We will discuss”

So, the book I have this time around is called “Mine”, by HelenKay Diamond. HelenKay is one word. That is her name, HelenKay. It was published in 2015. 

The premise, our leading lady, is Natalie Udall. She recently left the CIA, and not under happy or positive circumstances. She had been in a leadership position and, in order to keep her team members safe, she pursued a lead that higher-ups had told her to let go. Her intuition was correct and, as a result, she saved several lives, but the folks overseeing her were less than happy about her rogue actions, and so now she is no longer employed with the government, the CIA find her new freedom to be a potential threat, given that she was privy to a lot of confidential information, and although she's been allowed to leave, there are still some question marks as to whether the CIA will really allow her to live a quiet life or if she'll quickly just have an unfortunate accident that could permanently silence her. 

Enter our leading man, Gabe McIntosh. 

Nicole:

Oh, you have a Mac too!

Meghan:

I do, I do. I actually kind of thought it was funny like McIntosh I know that's a real-ass name, but it makes him sound so much more fake. I don't know why, but I wish it was something else. But they don't really harp on it so I don't care. So, Gabe McIntosh. 

Gabe is a former military guy. He currently runs a high-level security company. We know by the very first page that Gabe finds Natalie incredibly attractive. Gabe has taken on the assignment of keeping Natalie safe for the first few weeks after her release from the CIA, while it's being determined if there are any operatives that may be aiming to take her out. And just case in point, as to Gabe here and what he's thinking, “he viewed an assignment as just that, a file he memorized and a body to watch over. But with her he saw a woman smart-mouthed, determined not to be a victim, competent and hard to scare, so fucking hot.”

So, he's clearly into her. All right, Gabe's first move to ensure Natalie's safety is to secret her away to a remote cabin in Montana. While there the two of them have plenty of banter and plenty of boredom, their spare time is very quickly occupied with sex. Lots and lots.  Lots of sex.

Nicole:

Meghan, what would you say the ratio of plot to sex is for your book?

Meghan:

So much sex.  Copious amounts.  And if you removed the sex from this 300-ish page book, probably only about 150 pages would remain. 

Nicole:

Okay.

Meghan:

Yeah, I'm, I'm giving it a 50-50 split. That being said, the book doesn't skimp on plot, unlike yours. Beyond the sexy times with Gabe and Natalie in the midst of this CIA fallout, the book has a significant subplot as well, involving Gabe and his brothers, Andy and Rick. 

Nicole:

Okay.

Meghan:

We find out about varying childhood traumas experienced by both Gabe and Natalie. That comes into play and it gives us some context as to their behaviors and attitudes toward relationships. Overall, the plot kept my attention enough to get me past the excessive nudie scenes. 

And if you're new to this podcast, you know that I am not one for supremely explicit sex scenes. Not that I need a closed-door romance. I'm okay with an open-door romance. However, I don't like it to be the entirety of the relationship. I don't like it to be overwhelming. This was a lot for me. So, the fact that the plot was engaging enough that I could kind of ignore that it was a lot for me was helpful. Okay, I'm not going to give you any more plot points because I do not want to spoil the ending, but here we go. 

You know different thoughts, some quotes…

First of all, there was some thrumming. 

Second of all, no nose bridge pinching.  And there was lots of condom use, which I know you would appreciate. 

Nicole:

Oh, we love that!

Meghan:

 I also found interesting - you know you and I talk about books being written from both characters' point of view?  When you've got that main couple, this was no stranger to that. However, I think this might be the first book I've read on our podcast where the first chapter is from his perspective. 

I feel like almost every other book we've had, it starts with her perspective. That was really interesting and that was why I could tell you right away he was super into her, because he's the one whose thoughts we are privy to. I mean, he talks about his dick on the very first page. He's talking about his dick and I was like, oh, this is going to be a ride, right? One of the things he says is he only wished he could survive hours of foreplay. I'm like ugh. No, that is too much time. There are other things to do. 

Nicole:

God, my worries..my mind would start to wander. I have hard time with my mind wandering as it is. 

Meghan:

I'm like five minutes and my mind is already going. Did I take out the garbage? I can't. Hours? Get a grip, friend. 

Nicole:

More than five minutes, but I don't need hours plural. Of course I didn't say I only need five. I'm saying five minutes and my mind is already wandering. 

Meghan:

That's what I'm saying. My mind is already gone. Hours? No.  By the end, I would be like, you are on borrowed time, my friend. 

God, I have a bunch of quotes that I pulled from this book that I quite liked. 

Okay, most of these are Gabe thinking about or saying things to Natalie. This is his inner monologue: “He didn't buy into the whole idea of a strong woman automatically being cold in bed. That struck him as television bullshit, nonsense. Weak didn't interest him.” I like that a lot. 

Nicole:
 Right.

Meghan:

There's a point in time where you know they've been having an argument and they're trying to work it out and both of them, because of their past traumas, are having a difficult time feeling as though they should walk back to each other and do something about it. They get over it and one of the things that Gabe's brother says to him is, “it's never going to be easy being with her. She's not an easy woman.”  And Gabe is like, “That's okay.”  And inner monologue again, “Being with her, guaranteed life would never be easy. But Gabe loved that about her. She didn't just agree and live her life to make him happy. “

And then, on the heels of that, he says to her, “we are going to disappoint each other. Grate on each other, fight each other, but I am not going to leave you.”  And there..there are those relationships where people are fighting constantly and it's clear that there's conflict, but in this case it was more like they are both very strong, independent people and understanding that there was going to be conflict, but it was worth working through. You know very different than this is a bad relationship. It was more like it won't necessarily be free and easy, but it's worth it. 

Nicole:

I think that's very realistic too, and a very realistic way to approach it. Hey, it's not going to be sunshine and rainbows all the time, but we'll work through it and I'm committed to you. I like that. I like that a lot. 

Meghan:

Well, and again, one more on that same vein, because it was this whole thing that they were trying to work through. “He needed her to know that nothing about their relationship would be once and done. Some issues would take time and nurturing.” My God, that's legit, right? You know the conflicts there. It's worth working through that and getting to the other side. Yeah, loved that, love it, love it. 

My last quote here is a quote that I feel like could have been written about my own husband. I read it and I highlighted it right away. I was like, oh, it's like somebody is talking about my husband, “He came off as so capable and uncomplicated, the kind of guy with an ingrained set of rules and a theory about right and wrong that had more to do with practical life lessons than anything preached to him through the years.” Yeah, I was like, yep, that's my guy. Yeah, that is what I've got for you in this book. 

I think, Nicole, this actually would have been more your style of sexy, okay, and I know you're not into the same kinds of murder mysteries and the adventure stuff like that that I am, but I do think that you would have enjoyed the way this book put this together. It wasn't overly…what's the word I'm looking for? It wasn't like watching, “Taken” or something like that. It's got a good plot, despite the fact that you're not into those specific kinds of books. This seems more like your jam than mine from the level, and we're also going with Habanero on this side. Okay, we're not up to Ghost, not Ghost. I keep saying Ghost Pepper. It's Carolina Reaper. Either way, someone's dead and nobody died for this.

Nicole:

Nobody died. Okay, nobody died. What kinds of foods did you have? Because we've been talking about foods and books this year. 

Meghan:

We have. There wasn't anything really exciting. They were in the cabin in the woods and because of that there weren't a lot of provisions. So, soup from a can is kind of what we're getting here. I don't know that that's going to make it to our feast in the fall, if we decide to have a feast with a can of soup and coffee. So, I'm hoping that you have some better foods in your book. 

Nicole:

The sex droid just ate some steaks because, apparently he needed the protein. Okay, that's all I got.

Meghan:

Wow. 

Nicole:

Yeah, all right. Well, how about boobie prize?

Nicole:

Well, my breasts hit on page 28. “Eliana's head fell back on a moan and she lifted her shirt to cup her own breast.”

Meghan:

We're pretty close this time around. Okay, I am actually page 24. I feel like this is three in a row that I might have beat you. 

Nicole:

You've been beating me a lot lately, yeah.

Meghan:

Yeah, I mean, this is your fault. You gave this to me, so. 

Nicole:

I didn't win this week. 

Meghan:

I just stole it from you. “The way her nipples pressed against the tea had his gaze bouncing up and down her impressive body, but he forced his expression to stay blank.”

Nicole:

Okay, and romantic reminders. 

Meghan:

I feel like you probably have a good one based on some of your quotes, that's basically what it goes to is those quotes and I'm phrasing it as, “be okay saying you're sorry and apologizing for something, even if you don't have a final solution to the problem, because you know if your partner is hurting, you know if something is not feeling right, it's okay to say I'm sorry, but not quite know how to fix it yet.” And I did think that that was again, like you said, very realistic.  But also something that brings you closer together. If you can tell your partner, “hey, I'm so sorry, this hurt you, we'll figure it out.” That's so much better than, “you don't know the solution, so you stay silent or you just let things drag out.” 

That's pretty much it, just the ability to apologize while still working stuff out. Okay, that doesn't sound romantic, but I feel like it really is relationship building, truly.

Nicole:

Yes. 

Meghan:

How about you? 

Nicole:

My romantic reminder is, “please respect your partner's boundaries. Please don't force or coerce them into something they're not comfortable with.” 

I feel like she probably would have built up to the anal play and anal sex and he didn't need to force it on her If he had just been patient and like, hey, let's talk about it and what your comfort levels are.  Instead of being like, “nah, your asshole's mine, we're doing it.” 

Meghan:

This actually kind of brings up a point I wanted to talk about. It's the last thing on my list. I'm really curious now, after the last few books we've read, you know we'll read the synopsis and then we get into the book and it feels like the synopsis doesn't always match properly. 

Nicole:

Yeah, it doesn't match. 

Meghan:

And the back of my book, when I read it to me, felt like it was going to be more like what you're talking about the dominating…

Nicole:

Yeah, domination and forced scenarios that people aren't comfortable with. 

Meghan:

In fact, I'm just going to quick read a little bit of the back of my book. 

“She's strong-willed and difficult and all Gabe can think about is exerting his domination and stripping her of every expectation she has. Natalie has no intention of giving in to Gabe's straightforward demands of dominant sex with no attachments, even though the very idea of giving up control thrills her like nothing ever has.”

I feel like that was so misleading. Are there parts of this book where he's like I want to be in control tonight? Yeah, but not in a, “I'm going to exert my force and dominate you.”  It's just more, “hey, here's kind of what I'd like to do tonight. If you're on board, meet me in the bedroom” and then she gets to opt in. 

Nicole:

Yeah.

Meghan:

There are always, like you could say, a safe word or I'm not comfortable with this. He says multiple times in the book “you are in charge of the pace”.  And I find the back of this book so misleading compared to what was in it. I really thought I was going to hate it based on the back of the book. 

Nicole:

I know you were like “ew.” 

Meghan:

Yeah, entirely, and I feel like what you're describing is what I expected. I'm really curious how we end up with that kind of disconnect between the little blurb and the actual book. 

Nicole:

It's not the first time we've seen that either, where the back is misleading, I have to tell you, even my last book, “Say you Mean It”, I felt like that was kind of misleading as to what was going to be happening in this story. 

Meghan:

Well, my “Dance with the Fee Prince”, they kept talking about, like how sexy this book was going to be and how hot and steamy there was like nothing in there. 

Nicole:

My people in my Fae book. I had to read the whole series because they didn't even bang in the first book. Where was the hot fairy smut? 

Meghan:

Yeah, so that's a curiosity I have, and that's not something that we're going to solve on this particular episode, but it is something I'd maybe like to dig into a little deeper. Talk to somebody who knows a little bit more about the industry. And why do we get this kind of disconnect? Where does that come from? 

Nicole:

Or like cover characters who don't match their book descriptions. The book describes a redhead, then there's a blonde on the cover, or it describes like a blonde guy and then there's a dark haired guy. We see that a lot too, where they don't match their description at all. 

Meghan:

Speaking of descriptions, the cover of this book mine is just a naked torso dude showing off his abs. 

Nicole:

That's what I have on my cover too, Meghan. 

Meghan:

Yeah, okay, so we got naked ab guy.  And one of my thoughts during this series was like, this took place over a series of weeks. They didn't work out. Not even once. Where are his abs coming from? He never did a crunch or a sit up. He didn't go to the gym. There was no muscle building. He never had any creatine, no protein powder. My friend, how is this body happening? Just saying, can we have a little realism? Show him doing some push-ups or something. 

Nicole:

Anyway, I think that's one of the things I liked about one of my underwater romances, “Call of the Sea”, because she described her main male hero as having almost a soft belly. She didn't say rock hard abs or six pack abs.  Almost a soft belly, but he was still very muscular. But I was like that sounds very real to m.  Like, not every dude has a ripped rib cage. 

Meghan:

You know, I don't have a problem with this guy having a ripped rib cage. I just don't know how he's maintaining it, that's all. 

Nicole:

Well, and I'm going to say I would assume a merman would probably have a ripped cage just from all the swimming, naturally that is not a bad assumption, actually, all right. The things we concern ourselves about. 

Meghan:

I know I get distracted by all the wrong things. Other people are probably like, “this scene was so sexy” and I'm like, “where'd those abs come from?” 

Nicole:

Oh, God.  I couldn't help but get distracted during this B.O.B. book because number one, I was reading it on the beach and at the pool this weekend because we went to the coast for the weekend and I was trying to discreetly fold over the cover so people would see what I was reading…small children in the pool and stuff. And as I'm reading this and I'm like, oh, like, between the convulsing pussies and everything else, I'm like I can't focus because I'm just like incredulous about this. 

Meghan:

You did send me a message saying that you think you need to cover your books.

Nicole:

Like actually get a book cover, a book cover for my book. 

Meghan:

Yeah, it's not a bad idea. I don't think I would have felt okay reading this one in public, not because the cover is bad, but because I just could feel the judgment and people walking past me, I know. Oh. So, here's another thing. I just found this really interesting: I was looking at the front of the book where they've got different people saying great things about this author's previous books, everything else, and one of the things that caught my attention this one was praise for HelenKay Diamond. I didn't want to stop reading, and that quote is from Smart Bitches Trashy Books. I had never heard of them before, okay, but this book is from 2015. And I was like I wonder if they're still around. I looked them up, they are, and they have a podcast as well. They interview romance authors and talk about, you know, different tropes, and one of the authors that they just interviewed in the last couple months is HelenKay Diamond. 

Nicole:

Shut the hell up!

Meghan:

Yeah. So, I'm looking forward to it because I just found that tonight. 

Nicole:

I love it. 

Meghan:

And they also, once in a while, hook up with another romance novel podcast called Heaving Bosom. 

Nicole:

Oh them, I've heard of! 

Meghan:

Okay, they apparently do some like crossover episodes. Yeah, I'm like I've got so much on my agenda that I need to apparently check out and catch up with, but I'm looking forward to listening to the interview with HelenKay Diamond on that podcast. I'm really glad that I actually scrolled through and looked at these reviews, because I found something new that I get to listen to this week. 

Nicole:

You know it's funny about you saying that there were reviews in your book. 

Meghan:

You have reviews in yours as well?

Nicole:

Uh-huh. And I found it super hysterical because all three of them the first one, more twists and turns, blah, blah, blah, blah. The second one plot packed full. Third one this was probably more realistic, it was like left me panting for more. I was like, okay, that I could see, although I feel like, how could you want more? It's all pretty much laid out there. But the first two talking about the twists and turns in the plot, and I was like, really, though, did you actually read this book? 

Meghan:

You know, there is a book for every person out there. That is what I have…

Nicole: Sure, sure…

Meghan:  …always said and so... 

Nicole:

We don’t kink shame.  And if you like the anal play you have at it, you go right for it. 

Meghan:

Yeah, there's something for everybody.  And maybe that person, that's all they needed for a plot, really.

Nicole:

Yeah. I need more plot.

Meghan:

Which is again what I enjoyed about this book, was there was enough to keep me engaged, so thank you. Thank you, Miss Diamond.

Nicole:

I did try to give you something that you might not completely loathe reading. 

Meghan:

It is appreciated. I did not mean to give you something that was so gaudy and trite. 

Nicole:

You know what, though, out of the two of us, I'm probably the best person for that job. 

Meghan:

Yeah, I do appreciate that too. Much appreciation in this episode. 

Nicole:

So what do you have for the next episode, Meghan, as we continue our book trade for the month? 

Meghan:

Yeah, so the next one I've got here is called Kissing Bandit, by Margaret Rose. Desperate to forget her ex, Francesca Bloomfield is escaping to the lake for the summer. She's on her own with a flimsy business plan based on finding treasure in junk drawers and has a Volkswagen full of snacks. And she's got one rule no dating. Except she really likes kissing. That part she'll keep, and she starts a kissing list to prove it.  Too bad she spends her last night in town dancing with a backward hat-wearing wallflower looking for love. 

Meanwhile, former professional baseball player John Boggs has a bad case of the Cinderella's. The woman who set his world on fire during a dirty dancing scene, that he had no idea his wrecked body was capable of, is dominating his thoughts. His first attempt at something other than a one-night stand on the road completely backfired. He took things slow, gave his number, he dipped her and she ran. Fate has different plans. John is selling his father's estate and Francesca magically appears on his doorstep with a brand new “Franny's Finds” estate sale business card. Their attraction is undeniable, though it's clear they want different things a road trip and heroic rescue from spirit lake. Push them together at every turn and maybe, if they can, sift through the clutter of a former life. While unpacking their own hearts, they'll realize they're meant to be. One kiss at a time. They risk forever holding on to the past instead of embracing their destiny.” How about you? 

Nicole:

I have “Dark Roots and Cowboy Boots” by Luann McLean. I actually already started reading it at the beach. “Not just another small-town babe teetering on the Tennessee border, Hootertown, Kentucky, suits beautician Jamie Lee Carter just fine. She's the kind of gal who prefers long neck beers to Cosmos, bare feet to high heels and daisy dukes to Prada. But a bit of Flash might still win out over another pool hall line dance. That's where Parker Carrington, a hunky Hollywood producer, comes in. Not just another Saturday Night Fling. He's pegged Hootertown as an ideal movie site and Jamie as more than a sexy extra. He's adding sizzle to Jamie's romantic slump and firing up something called jealousy in Griff Sheldon, Jamie's brother's best friend and her longtime crush. Now two hot-blooded rivals are going head-to-head. One's got a Jaguar, one's got a pickup, and only one has got what it takes to give Jamie the ride of her life. 

Meghan:

Wow, Hootertown.  Hootertown, wow. Well, have fun with that one y'all. 

Nicole:

I can tell you there was already some perming happening and it was very realistic as to the perming. Good yeah. 

Meghan:

Well, it does seem like these next books are going to be more our personal speed. 

Nicole:

Yes.

Meghan:

All right, folks, thanks for joining us today for Romance on the Rocks. Please like, subscribe, and follow.  And if you are a hopelessly romantic bookish biddie like us, think about leaving us a review on Apple, iTunes, Spotify, YouTube wherever you catch your podcasts. We are on buymeacoffee.com/romanceontherocks, so you can find us there as well. And until next time, just know that your support really means the world to us. Stay safe and know that you are loved.